On Transformers and GI Joes

Let's get a few things out of the way.

1. The Transformers films aren't good, nor will they ever be.
2. The GI Joe movie won't be all that good either.
3. The originals weren't all that great to begin with.

When I went in to see Transformers, my expectations were low and naturally so. The first one was an empty mess, and the sequel was no different. I didn't feel particularly bad about seeing either film as my view of the properties were largely formed when I was a child. Back then, it wasn't all that important for my cartoon heroes to have characterization or my stories to have much more than plot. I went back recently and watched a few episodes of some of these properties that have been "bastardized" and am STILL left wondering what the big deal is.

Was it such a big deal that they made Optimus Prime look more like the vehicle he mimics? Would keeping the original design have actually helped in a modern translation of Transformers? "Oh my, it's Optimus BOX, leader of the lincoln logs." If I had seen that old design in a live-action film, I'm not sure I could have enjoyed it. And I'm completely certain that the film wouldn't have grossed quite as much as it did. The same question applies to the new G.I. Joe movie. How could a direct translation from the cartoon look good in real life or actually make sense? In this technological future we live in, body suits are a natural suggestion to make impossible acts of heroism work. Just having regular guys run around shooting each other isn't all that interesting, and is best left for war films. Did you really want to see a direct Saturday Morning Cartoon translation on the big screen, complete with a "lesson" about how you shouldn't talk to strangers?

Something to think about.