Review of Thor

Directed by: Kenneth Branagh
Written by: Ashley Miller, Zack Stentz, & Don Payne
Starring: Chris Hemsworth, Natalie Portman, & Anthony Hopkins


If I was forced to describe Thor in one word, it would be: Tonal Mess. That is not to say it doesn’t have good things about it, it just means that they don’t work well together. Thor as a whole is less than the sum of its parts.

Thor tells the story of Thor (Chris Hemsworth), the future King of Asgard, who is an arrogant warmongering brat who defies the King/his father (Anthony Hopkins) and gets banished to Earth, while also losing the ability to use the mighty Mjolnir, the hammer which gives him his powers. Meanwhile in Asgard, Loki is planning his ascent to the throne and starts a whole lot of trouble. Review with spoilers after the jump.

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Doctor Who Recap & Review: The Curse of the Black Spot


Directed By: Jeremy Webb
Written By: Stephen Thompson


How can one follow up such a mind-bending two-parter as Impossible Astronaut and Day of the Moon? Simple. They can’t, and they don’t in the third episode of the new season. Instead, the overall arc takes a backseat to a simple pirate story, which we’ve outlined below in this week’s Recap and Review!

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Game of Thrones Recap & Review: Weeks 1-3

Game of Thrones is a fantasy television series produced by HBO, based on the George R.R. Martin series of novels, A Song of Ice and Fire. It stars Sean Bean, Peter Dinklage, and Lena Headley, as part of a very large cast. Game of Thrones airs Sunday nights.

Each week I will provide a brief recap of the week’s episode and review it. This week’s post will cover the first three episodes of the show, titled Winter is Coming, The Kingsroad, and Lord Snow.
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Review of Fast Five

Directed by: Justin Lin
Written by: Chris Morgan, & Gary Scot Thompson (characters)
Starring: Vin Diesel, Paul Walker, Dwayne Johnson, & Jordana Brewster


Sometimes when you go to see a movie you walk into the theater expecting an emotionally touching plot, snappy intelligent dialogue, and one or two tour de force performances. And sometimes you go to have fun. Fast five definitely qualifies as the latter. Some of you might say “but movies are supposed to be good, not fun” and I would reply “stop being so pretentious and learn to enjoy life.” Fast Five doesn’t try to be high art, it tries to be a car-focused balls-to-the-wall thrill-ride heist action film, and it succeeds entirely. Review with spoilers after the jump.

Fast Five follows the actions of three federal fugitives (Diesel, Walker, Brewster) as they attempt to establish a life in Rio de Janeiro, only to immediately get roped into a visually impressive car heist and become entangled with the most powerful criminal mastermind in Brazil, all while being tracked by “the guy the FBI hires when they want people found (Johnson).” To get their way out of trouble they bring back most of the characters from the past four films, cashing in on the viewer’s nostalgia, to plan “one last job.” Continue reading “Review of Fast Five”

Doctor Who Recap & Review: Day of the Moon

Rory And Amy

Directed By: Toby Haynes
Written By: Steven Moffat


You can be certain of one thing when it comes to a Moffat led two-parter: you’re in for quite a ride. There’s a lot to sum up, so let’s get right into it, shall we?
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Doctor Who Recap & Review: The Impossible Astronaut

The Impossible Astronaut


Directed By: Toby Haynes
Written By: Steven Moffat

It’s safe to say that most of us here at Technicolor Commentary are big fans of the BBC sci-fi romp Doctor Who. Last year, Steven Moffat took over the reigns from Russell T. Davies and made perhaps one of the better seasons yet, following closely behind season three (TCC opinions may vary). This year Moffat starts the first episode of the new season off with a bang…literally.
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Review of Hanna

Eric Bana and Saoirse Ronan in Hanna

Directed by: Joe Wright
Written By: Seth Lochhead & David Farr
Starring: Saoirse Ronan, Cate Blanchett and Eric Bana


Here’s the short review: It’s awesome. Here’s the not-so-short review: It’s really awesome. I’m a bit of a fan of the action film, and there have been a lamentable lack of them lately with the kind of writing and art film styling present here in Hanna. For those of you who haven’t seen any of the trailers or who have generally been living under a rock, Hanna is the story of a young assassin given the choice to enact revenge on an intelligence agent by her father, played brilliantly by Eric Bana. “She won’t stop until you’re dead,” Bana says, referring to Cate Blanchett’s character, “or she is.”
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Quick and Dirty Rental Review: I Spit On Your Grave (remake)

Generally I am not a big fan of remakes, because usually the original vision is lost and it never quite adds up. I will sometimes make exceptions for horror movies.  I think because the methods used for making the scary gory stuff has changed a bit, and more can be done.  There have been some pretty good remakes over the years. One of my favorites being The Hills Have Eyes. And of course there were some remakes that should never have been done, such as The Texas Chainsaw Massacre.

Horror has been a favorite genre of mine for a very long time. I treat horror movies much like sex and pizza.  (Even if it’s bad…etc…etc)  Generally I don’t turn them down, although as I have gotten older the gore just isn’t that fun anymore and I am not a big fan of torture porn. (read: Saw)

I decided to use my free monthly Redbox rental and pick up I Spit On Your Grave, the remake. I had no idea it was remade, and was a bit shocked to see it. Since I loved the original so much, I figured why not.  I went into this movie not expecting much at all, I was putting a pretty big wager on the fact it was going to suck. I was pleasantly surprised.  There were a few points where it got a little draggy.  And at the end it was straight up torture porn, there are quite a few cringe “Oh my god” moments.  But I am glad I took the chance, it was an entertaining slasher movie.


Quick and Dirty Rental Review: How Do You Know

It might be a good idea to consider this more a warning than a review. Look, I like Paul Rudd. I like Jack Nicholson. I can even tolerate Reese Witherspoon and Owen Wilson.  That being said How Do You Know was pretty awful.
(and let me be honest on this one, I didn’t really watch the whole thing. In fact I am not even sure how it ended. I checked out pretty quick.)
This movie was just one big ball of awkward. None of the actors seemed like they were really comfortable in their roles, or with each other. Some of the dialogue and pacing was just rotten.  It felt like they were just all showing up for the paycheck.  Reese Witherspoon’s character was really annoying. I mean wow, really annoying. I stopping caring about her after about ten minutes.  And if this was supposed to be a comedy, I was kind of failing to see the funny.  If there were jokes, I totally missed them.
There were parts of the movie that I just had no freaking idea what was going on. In fact I couldn’t even figure out where the basic steps of the romcom came and went. It’s as if the director just threw up his hands and said “Pfff we don’t need no stinking formula. Everyone just run around willy nilly.”
(now it could have wrapped up nicely in the usual romcom way but I am not sure.)
Through all of that negativity I did find Annie played by Kathryn Hahn to be a fun character. The parts of it where she was involved were enjoyable.  And I did like the blind date scene between Paul Rudd and Reese Witherspoon. Of course part of that might be because they didn’t say a word.
Just skip this one kids, I am sure another big casted romcom is right around the corner.

Swigs of Sucker Punch

I am not entirely sure how I feel about this movie.

The bad:

  • Zack tried to play this movie off as “Women kick ass” when it just portrays “Dudes are assholes and women just have to grin and bear it until someone comes to save them”.
  • Baby Doll’s escape fantasies are basically straight video game rips, but the movie is supposed to be based in what appears to be the 50s.
  • A bit of the CGI sucks. (Though it is kind of funny considering the game it obviously references)
  • The big unspoken evil in the movie was abuse, but it was subtle enough for GADS of people to miss it.
  • It is really, really depressing.

The middle:

  • The dialogue was fairly meh and full of clichés.  – I’ll give that a pass since it was not only staged in a mental institution full of severely damaged people, but also had a traumatized young girl who dived into fantasy at every chance as the editor. Zack probably wasn’t thinking that hard, but that angle makes it better.
  • It seems Snyder had good intentions for the story, but got lost in his own ideas of empowerment and was thwarted further by nitpicking edits.
  • The protagonists are pretty much blank slates. Many of the folks who dislike this movie hate that, but it touches back on the fact that this movie is very game, and/or action flick, based.

But on the frosted side:

  • Armored mech with a pink bunny on it. (I’m easy sometimes.)
  • Most of the CGI was very pretty. I left the movie drunk off the visuals.
  • I’m a gamer. Sometimes I have to take turns playing a game. It doesn’t make the game any less fun.
  • The first few minutes of the movie, which lacked dialogue, were extremely well done. If the whole movie would have been that, it would have been fantastic.
  • The soundtrack, though full of covers, fit the scenes quite well.

Wait… Pretty, even sounds hot, kind of stupid, and you wake up the next day with a headache from the past night’s events.

Did I pick up Sucker Punch at the bar?