Yawnsters vs. Aliens
Posted by thegreatredhope
Keep looking tough, idiots
I finally got around to watching Monsters Vs. Aliens, which I'd been vehemently avoiding since I saw the first trailer. The title really says it all, doesn't it? I assumed one of two things: Either they were really going full-tilt and making a shameless homage to 50's monster movies, or they were trying to be cool. Guess what; Dreamworks went with the latter.
Don't get me wrong, I assume (some of) the creators were in the "50's monster movie" mindset, but it barely bleeds through. All we get is another forgettable CGI animated feature. Why is it so forgettable? Why is it squarely on my shit list of other movies just like it? Funny you should ask...
- Certain things are really indistinguishable from other movies of its ilk (Bee Movie, Shark Tale, Kung Fu Panda, etc) Especially any quirky, nervous female leads. They always sound forced. Always.
- Don't forget the instantaneously self-dating pop culture humor. That Al Gore joke will be funny forEVER, you guys.
- I'm perturbed by this because it got decent critical acclaim. Have their standards been lowering over time? You'd think with folks like Pixar pushing the envelope they'd have HIGHER standards. Same thing happened with Kung Fu Panda. Tell me why people were so kind to that movie.
- The animation pushes the models to their limits, and every subtle squash and stretch, along with every cartoony little anticipation/follow-through makes the characters look like jelly. B.O.B. notwithstanding.
- The voiceover work is distracting more than anything. Why are Paul Rudd and Seth Rogen making animated films? Their voices are, frankly, unremarkable. Also, who needs Reese Witherspoon's EXACT voice to make the character come to life?
- Dialogue feels forced, cliched. The most frustrating part, by far, is that some of these jokes/situations are funny on paper, but somewhere in the scriptwriting/acting/animation/editing phase, the humor was carved out. All those things really need to be in sync in order for something like that to work.
- Story had sooooo much meaty potential, but they lingered in that grey area between overbearing and undeserving exposition. In a film called "Monsters Vs. Aliens", I'm really not gonna care too much about the rationale behind the characters and the action. But, if you're thoughtful enough to hand me some, I'd like a little bit more than "we've been kept here for 50 years". LOL WUT.
Monsters Vs. Aliens. Sub-par, and a lot of the visuals look ridiculous and confusing outside of their intended 3D realm. But putting Insectosaurus in your film carries it slightly above total failure.
Reflections on Gremlins
Posted by thegreatredhope
We'll be watching GREMLINS tonight, as I'm sure you're aware. Let's take a little time beforehand to share some reflections of a film that owns property on a small but valuable space of my brain. What do I remember, exactly? Well, it's been a while...
- Most would classify this film as "black comedy". More accurately, I think we could label it "wow, this is a black comedy?" Maybe I was too young (read: naive, sheltered) to realize this was supposed to be funny, nay, a PARODY of monster films. Guess I needed to bone up on my cheesy monster movies first.
- For a comedy, this specimen sure is violent. As tough as the gremlins look on the exterior, they're all goo and pulp on the insides. And don't worry; you'll get plenty of chances to see what they're made of. There was something about a blender, a microwave, maybe some getting run over...
- I recall the gremlins looking too terrifying and evil to be mischievous. For all I knew they could've crawled out from the pits of hell to feast on our livestock and kidnap our children. I'm much less likely to assume, based on their appearance, that they'd be running around like Daffy Duck on steroids. I think they tried to offset this in the sequel, but the goofy ones, somehow, are infinitely creepier.
- Man, this movie scared me something fierce when I was a kid.
- Regardless, the theme song is exceptional, and it'll stick with you forever...
- Setting this during the Christmas season is a nice touch, but it only adds to the creepiness factor. When is an invasion by terrifying monsters LESS funny than during the snowy, tranquil holidays?
- When I hear about gremlin lore, I think of these gremlins specifically. Yes, I'm aware they've been around for untold years, appearing in folk tales all over the globe, but...too bad, as far as I'm concerned they're the DEFINITIVE version of the creatures.
- My dog's mother was named Gizmo. And she looked like Gizmo. My dog doesn't.
There you have it, my collection of thoughts and memories about Gremlins. Will I have my mind changed? Will it reinforce itself as a film that's much scarier than people say? Will it be a 2 hour gloppy, gory, puppet orgy of mayhem? Find out when we watch it...TONIGHT!!!!!
After Hours
Posted by thegreatredhope
It's official: I've discovered the most forgotten mainstream film of all time. That distinction rests with the 1985 film "After Hours". I discovered it perusing the Netflix Instant Play library. The summary sounded intriguing:
"Paul Hackett (Griffin Dunne) embarks on a trip to New York City's SoHo district in hopes of hooking up with a recent acquaintance, the beautiful Marcy Franklin (Rosanna Arquette). But Paul loses all his money, and just to get back home he must endure a night of kooks, psychotics, punks and an angry mob trying to kill him."
Whoa, so like, his whole night just unravels and gets crazier and crazier? I love movies like that!! The downward spiral that takes place over one single piece of time! Well, the movie is most certainly crazy. But the "dark" seems to overcompensate loudly for the "comedy". It's strange to watch a film vacuum any humor out of its various situations. There's suicide, awkward meet-ups with the opposite sex, punk parties, all the wacky stuff that gets punctuated by a night alone in a New York City neighborhood. And yet...nothing the characters do makes any damn sense! Awkward scene after awkward scene between people play out, all the while you're thinking, "Who would do that?" or "There's a really simple way to get out of this situation". Kinda like watching Curb Your Enthusiasm, except EVERYONE is Larry David or weirder. There ain't a single "regular" person there to contrast the weirdness.
Maybe this movie was created in another, weirder dimension and was accidentally shipped to this one. Although that'd be tough, since the director was (get this) none other than (you ready?) Martin freakin Scorsese!!! In know, right?! There are certain shots that are very indicative of his work, like quick push-ins and long, long, looooong takes in a scene. But they really don't add anything to the story; they stand out like sore thumbs, mainly because the rest of the pacing, acting, and shot composition are so slowly-paced. This came off as a practice film; each scene had waaaay too much air. And the truckloads of cameos didn't help (although it does feature both parents from Home Alone...and Cheech...and Chong).
Ideally, a dark comedy should make me feel sly or mischievous, like I've gotten away with something. Instead I felt as weirded-out as the protagonist...but maybe that was the idea? There are way too many "but maybe's" when I reflect on this movie. Perhaps it would have fared better under its original director, Tim Burton (yes, really). He really had a knack for weird, dark, 80s cult comedies. And those were actually funny.
Gawd, even the TRAILER'S pace is saggy.
You Basterds!!
Posted by thegreatredhope
I had the misfortune of going to film school after Quentin Tarantino burst onto the film scene. Needless to say, by the end of my run, I was sick to death of every cinematic trope he made "cool". I'd had it up to HERE with lengthy dialogue about some small piece of pop culture, references to film eras I was not privy to, and badass violence for the sake of pure, badass violence.
I'd been hearing about his latest, Inglourious Basterds, for a long, long time. There had been rumors of Tarantino making a WWII-era film for the last 10 years or so. Was I excited to learn that it would finally see the light of day? Not even close. I was ready for that guy to disappear forever, especially after the ultimate self-indulgent flick Death Proof. Goodbye Tarantino, you had your fun.
Yet, I started hearing more and more positive buzz about Inglourious Basterds, and I was hearing it from people who shared the same anti-Tarantino sentiment as me. Needless to say, after absorbing enough of this hype, I marched in to see exactly what they were talking about...
And I really liked it! My life wasn't changed, but I think that expectation is just a smidge unrealistic for his movies. All of his tropes were there, but they actually served the story very well. And any moments that seemed cool for the sake of being cool actually served the story. See, that's where I come away with the most respect for this film: It was self-contained. His other films feel like elements of cinema from many different eras all mushed together. Yet, you can tell that this new concoction is made up of tiny little pieces. This flick, however, really blended all the inspirational elements (and there are many) to form something entirely his own. For once he seemed to really use his influences to take this film to a level all its own.
So please do check this one out if you're at all curious, if not only for its (truly) unforgettable climax. My mind ain't totally changed on this Tarantino fella, but as an independent work it's something I can really respect. Looks like the guy finally found a story that suits him just perfectly.
Fictionalized History
Posted by thegreatredhope
Made it a point to stay up late and Finish "Frost/Nixon" the other night. Why did I do this? Well calm the hell down, I'm gonna tell ya...
I was extremely invested in the story, mainly because it extracted legitimate drama from real-world people and the situations they found themselves in. The real icing on the cake, however, was that it was all BASED ON A TRUE STORY. Oh, what a fun blanket statement. Hollywood can ride for miles and miles on that sentence.
I really enjoyed the movie overall, but I was hesitant to look up any info about the film afterwords (as I'm prone to doing) in fear of having the drama become undermined. I wanted to remain just a little naive and assume that whole thing was strongly rooted in reality. I mean, it was Richard Nixon after all. That guy could stir up some pretty dramatic shite. But, of course, curiosity got the best of me, and I looked it up. Go figure, a lot of it was altered for the purposes of drama. Should've expected this from the team that brought you "A Beautiful Mind". Ech.
I just wonder how much further films could ride on their drama if they didn't cling so tightly to the "based on a true story" angle. I'm guessing most people take that phrase with a grain of salt. And since the filmmakers never claim WHICH PART of the film comes from the real story, we're left to optimistically assume that all of this happens in the real world. Would it perhaps be easier to downplay the fact that these have their roots in true stories? An innumerable amount of films are based on true events, even if those events are just small moments of inspiration. Think about how many horror movies ride the hype of "based on a true story". Now think about how ridiculous it is to claim that a movie about ghosts is trying to recreate something that actually happened. OOhhhhh.
Maybe the most compelling angle you could hype is to keep the "true" parts to yourself. Compelling stories will sell regardless of their source material, and rigidly pairing a Hollywood film with reality can only harm its credibility.
Oh, and here's a funny article to support my argument.
Digital Film for The Depression Era
Posted by thegreatredhope
The year is 1933: Gangsters run amok, robbing banks in downtown Chicago. The great depression has the United States in dire straits. All of this is captured with...handheld digital cameras?
So I saw Michael Mann's 'Public Enemies' last night. Overall I enjoyed the flick quite a bit, but there was something that kept tearing my attention away from the story: They shot a good chunk of this film on handheld digital cameras. This was a big surprise to me, since none of that style really came through in the trailers. But I want to establish that I'm all for advances in film tech and directors experimenting to get the best possible shots for their films. But handheld digital cameras emulate such a modern style and atmosphere; I'm not sure how appropriate they were in a 1933 gangster movie. The way digital cameras pick up light or sound is so inherent to a post-millennial, '28 Days Later'-style of filmmaking. It just comes across as very "unnatural" for a strong period piece. It's odd to see that shaky-cam style with all the little dancing pixels picking up G-Men firing tommy guns out of a Ford Model-T.
Maybe I'm too accustomed to seeing epic period pieces shot like epic old-school Hollywood films. There was a great sense of realism that Mann brought to the events depicted in the film. But overall, it was a very strange thing to witness, to say the least. It was almost as if I was watching footage of rehearsals on set, shot by a PA. Which, considering how it all plays out, wouldn't be the worst thing to watch.
That Transformers Movie
Posted by movieguyjon
Hey folks, just got back from watching Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen. Here's my thoughts on the flick:
It was fun.
There's really not that much more to say on the matter. There were explosions, Megan Fox's bosoms, and a crotchety old Decepticon with a badass beard made of shredded metal. If you were expecting anything more than that, something along the calibre of Star Trek or Dark Knight even, that's your problem. Truth of the matter is, this film did what it set out to do and it was entertaining. Who cares if it was dumb? If you jump into your nearby time machine and check out the old cartoon, you'll notice that the plots aren't much different and the characters aren't that much more fleshed out.
I've got this sneaking suspicion that a lot of people expect way too much from these movies and all I really have to say to that is that this movie is based off of a set of action figures that spawned a cheesy cartoon series. Just sit back and be entertained. It's not going to be an oscar contender or on any top 10 lists, but it's a good way to spend the afternoon!
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